Something Sweet to Remember

It's been over a year since my last post. 

I had every intention of keeping up now that I am "retired."

But life got in the way. 

Today, I needed to post.

There is a custom I learned years ago from attending Chinese funerals.

When guests leave the service, 

they are handed a piece of candy and sometimes coins.

I asked my mom about this and I remember her saying that the candy is to help 

take away the bitterness and replace it with something sweet. 

Coins were given to children to buy candy.

(This was years ago, and a dime or quarter would have been enough to buy a piece of candy).

I have tried to carry on this tradition,

giving something sweet to help remember sweet memories of those we have lost,

although I have modified it a bit.

Sometimes candy, sometimes ice cream, 

sometimes cupcakes or cookies,

and occasionally, something sweet from Starbucks.

All with the same intention,

sweet memories to help us process the loss.

Yesterday was a tough day.
I got news that two friends passed.

One I hadn’t seen in over 40 years.
The other I had just seen a few years ago.

Middle school for a chubby, shy, immigrant, 

thirteen-year-old girl could be terrifying and brutal.

But it wasn’t for me.
Tehipite Junior High didn’t have the best reputation,
or was on the list of good schools,

But I had very fond memories of my time there.

I was lucky to have been surrounded by friends 

who were also really good people.
Together we went through growing pains and adolescent awkwardness,

And survived.
Aram was one of those friends.
We grew up together.
He was skinny and tall,
with the longest legs ever,
dark, wavy, late 70’s hair,
and a beautiful smile.
He made me laugh.
Even though he acted tough,

I knew he had a soft heart.
He loved the rock group Kiss
and made fun of my Bay City Rollers.

He helped make going to middle school safe for me.

We lost touch after high school

until Facebook reconnected us.
He married a teacher.
He had two sons.
He loved being a grandfather.

Yesterday, I found out he passed away.

Some people, 

No matter how much time has passed,

Continue to hold a place in your heart.

Grateful that Aram was a part of my life,

If you looked up the word teacher,

you’d see a picture of Ms. Medina.
When I transferred to Belvedere Elementary 9 years ago,

she was one of the first people to welcome me.
She WAS Belvedere.

She had taught there for over 4 decades

and knew every student and family in the community.

She was strict and held high expectations,

and she was kind and loving too.
She dressed professionally every day,

and unlike me,
she never looked flustered or frustrated.

I can tell she loved being a teacher by the way she talked about students,

the time and effort she spent creating her class environment,

and how she carried herself daily.
She lived in the community.

She was known as the teacher,

and deeply respected.

I will always remember her kindness,

encouragement and support

the year I had the most challenging class.

I will remember the zucchini bread

and delicious cookies delivered 

to my classroom each holiday season.
I will remember the most beautiful and HUGE

plant arrangement she sent when I retired.

I will cherish the thoughtful notes and 

Inspiring, uplifting words she has shared with me.

So today I had a mango and coconut smoothie.

It was a sweet treat 

to remember sweet memories

of two special people who have impacted my life.